This post is dedicated to all the Men, Women and Families of the United States Military.
Specifically, Anthony Lamotta, Timothy Money, Michelle Bruce, Chris Brown, and Battalion 3/23. i love you all and my prayers are with you this holiday season. i wish you could be here.

Merry Christmas.

Let there be peace on earth, and let it begin with me.
Let there be peace on Earth,the peace that was meant to be.

With God as our Father, brothers all are we,
Let me walk with my brother, in perfect harmony.

Let peace begin with me, let this be the moment now.
With every step I take, let this be my solemn vow,

To take each moment and live each moment in peace, eternally.
Let there be Peace on Earth, and let it begin with me.

IT'S MY BIRTHDAY!

AND I'LL PARTY IF I WANT TO!

(hehehehe. wow. im no longer jailbait. nice.)
call me and wish me a happy birthday suckers! lol.

Happy Birthday to YOU!

Happy Birthday to YOU!

Happy Birthday dear M I K E !

Happy Birthday to YOU!

im excited babe! its gonna be a GREAT birthday night!
thanks for being so wonderful!

HOLY CRAP.

where did this year go to?
seriously?

talk about flying by..
cant wait though.. its gonna be grand. and hilarious..
and there will be plenty of pictures..

and technically its not 168 hours.. its
155 hours and 32 mins away.
damn.

ps/ im having a bad day. work is getting really bad.. i have no money.. well i have like 100 bucks. but heres the deal.. i still have to get 2 christmas gifts... 3 birthday gifts ... pay my cell phone bill.. pray i get tipped good these next few days.. better yet pray i get a better job.  and today. i was putting together my bed, my christmas gift from moma.. and the spring on the bedframe popped and i just about broke my leg. it hurts soooooo badd and its black and blue. seriously.

i gonna go and cry. im emotional and it scared the ever livin outta me.
-wethead.

im finding out, again.
your all i need.

you are everything i ever need im crying out for less of me
and more of you so i can say Lord have your way! HAVE YOUR WAY!

you are my favorite part of me.
my all, my world i lay it at your feet.
i worship you, no other name.
cause you are my favorite.. favorite part of me.

You tell me that you need me Then you go and cut me down, but wait
You tell me that you're sorry Didn't think I'd turn around, and say...

It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

I loved you with a fire red- Now it's turning blue, and you say...
"Sorry" like the angel heaven let me think was you
But I'm afraid...

It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

so on top of all my other weekly shat.

we "broke up" if you will. im trying to be nice about it.
trying to be civil. he's being a jerk. of course.
why should i expect anything less..

and tonight im working sunday night football at the bar.
guess who's playing. the steelers. his hometown team.

he'll be there. with a bunch of asses that he calls friends.
nights like this i wish i had some really big brothers.
tonight i'll need bouncers. pray i keep my patience.

you know what. I HOPE THE EFFIN STEELRS LOOSE! GO OTHER TEAM!

i just want to cry. again. for the 3rd time today.
im tired of this. im tired of running and hiding.. im tired of not knowing.. anything.
im tired of feeling out of place or alone.. or desperate.

in all aspects of life.

if i told you what was really going on.. you'd judge me. you would.
if you knew what i was really feeling, you'd tell me get over it.

im tired of conforming. i hate it. whether its christian. or secular. or whatever.
i hate conformity. i cant even tell the difference between whats God and whats not.

i feel blind. i feel lied to and cheated.
im lonely, too.

but you dont care. you think im dramatic. or overly anxious.
so what if i am. does that mean i shouldnt be heard?

on top of all of this other- i broke my mothers heart.
she learned i wasnt a virgin. she asked. so i didnt lie.

i've been offered a job in vegas. part of me says "hell no. danger zone"
part of me says "do it. clean break. start fresh. theres no past there."

once again im at a crossroads. with no money and no direction.
and i just want to cry.

i quit.

"I can hear the bells...Well, don't ya hear them chime?
Can't you feel my heartbeat keeping perfect time?"

i've made my decesion.
AL must like me. really. we hung out tonight.
went up to the bar... had a few drinks..
went out to the tavern.. listened to johnny cash, david allan coe and sammy kershaw. (lol)
then we went to walmart. and when i dropped him at home..

he kissed me. 3 times.
my heart was totally unprepared but yet so ready.
he's a nice boy. i think i could totally be a steelers fan and a navy girlfriend(again)

has that ever happened to you?? have you ever experienced that before?
a boy just looks at you and you automatically feel the butterflys begin to stir?
or he kisses you.. gingerly and it takes you a moment to breath again?
or the touch of his hand on your neck will give you goosebumps?

i havnt had that since michael. not even todd moved me in such a way.
i think i like him. and i think he likes me. and i think.. this is the begining of something exciting.

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to the united states military. past, present and future. THANK YOU. to all the service men & women. to all the mothers, fathers, wives, husbands, sons daughters, aunts, uncles, grandparents, brothers, sisters, neices, nephews and friends. i thank you. if it wasnt for the great sacrifice... i wouldnt live in a country where i can celebrate my freedom. to everyone who's ever lost anyone... your loss is not forgotten, or miscounted. thank you.

 i think thats everything.  anyways.. today is Thanksgiving. Embrace the things your grateful for and Thank the Lord for it. He was the one that gave it to you. I pray you all have a safe, amazing & blessed thanksgiving. no matter where you are.. what you do.. live. and live well.
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Happy Thanksgiving Yall!